ZAT’S ALL FOR NOW, FOLKS!

 

The time has come to bid farewell to the #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge2025. Twenty-five exciting days have gone by, with many of us bloggers trying to beat time by sticking to the alphabet in all kinds of zany ways. It was a period of intense activity for all, I am sure, trying to juggle work, play, recreation and a writing schedule which could not be ignored.

                                                                                               TheWriteAtHome Blog

The wonderful Blogchatter team had asked us all to create a list of topics well in advance so that we would not be left scratching our heads at the last moment. However, some folks rarely take good advice. So, there I was on April 1^st, having travelled all the way from Cochin to Johannesburg, with not an iota of an idea in my head.

One look at Zo and Sam, and the four-legged duo, and I had found my muse(s)! There was also a hint of a selfish motive because I realised that this would be a good way to showcase everything we did here with the kids to the great-grandmothers, the grandmothers and grandfathers (our siblings) and our umpteen relatives and friends.

                                                                                             PictureQuotes.com

Every evening, we would all have a discussion on what aspect of our holiday I could write on. Many were the choices handed out by Zo and Sam, some brilliant and some frankly crazy. When they got back from school, their first query after some horseplay with the dogs would be, “Mooma, what is your letter for tomorrow?” P also had some prompts which I was prompt in using.

Thus, whenever we went out for a meal, a celebration, a restaurant, or even a drive, photographs had to be taken, and since V’s mobile camera is the best, I am sure he is going to end up with no space, and much deleting to do.

The actual writing did not take much time, maybe because I was writing on everyone I love, and everything I enjoy. On some days, when we were out all days, it would turn into a bit of a rush, because Johannesburg is three and a half hours behind India. Which meant that I had to complete my blog post at least by eight in the evening so that I could upload it on Blogrolls and share it on Facebook.

This was an opportunity to read the posts of many bloggers whose writing I had always admired, and to appreciate the myriad ways in which alphabets could be used. Reading others’ posts, commenting and sharing them on Twitter was a frequent activity. I am afraid I did not stick to Sundays for this pleasurable activity, but did it whenever I got a rare free moment, away from sticky fingers and bear hugs.

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This may also be the moment to thank the Blogchatter team for all that they do for us – before and during every challenge. They often have pre-videos to let us know what they expect, they patiently listen to our doubts and reply to them, they create the most adorable stickers and just to boost our morale, they give us achievement stickers that we flaunt proudly on social media, all the while adding points to our total tally.

                                                                                            theheavenhome

Having been part of Blogchatter for the last few years, I can safely say that it has been an enriching experience. Not only have I been able to hone my writing over various challenging tasks, but I also have made many writer friends, who have influenced my own writing style as well. Whenever I have reached out to the Blogchatter team, they have always helped me out, doing their best to iron out any issues that I may have had.

As the April #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge2025 comes to an end, may I wish my fellow bloggers all the very best in their writing, and may Blogchatter go on in leaps and bounds, with their amazing tasks and challenges, their offline and online meets, and in the way they continue to foster bonhomie and good cheer amongst the community.

As for my Zo and Sam chronicles, it is time to say goodbye to this present chapter, but as they grow in years, there will be much more to be added, something which I look forward to. They will always remain my muses. After all, as the Hindi saying goes, “Ghar ki khheti hain!” (It is home grown!)

And zat's all for now, folks! Au revoir!

                                                                        PosterMyWall

I am participating in the #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge2025.

https://deepties.blogspot.com/2025/04/zats-all-for-now-folks.html

YOUTH AND OLD AGE

 

Paeans have been written over the centuries on the relationship between different generations and the dreaded generation gap that creates such havoc. Poets have waxed eloquent over the concept, referring to the chasm between April and December, and that never the twain shall meet.

In my opinion, the biggest advantage we had growing up was to have our maternal grandparents with us at home. When my dad passed away, they were like a buffer, shielding us all as much as possible from all further hurt.

Joint families were the norm in India. Children grew up as naturally as the leaves on a tree as cousins bonded, enjoying the love and nurturing of many sets of parents. There was no spoiling or pampering. Everyone ate the same kind of food with absolutely no fuss. Finicky eaters learnt to eat faster as they did not want to be left out of the fun later. Little falls and bruises were ignored. There was no question of special treats because there were too many mouths to feed.

                                                                                                           Freepik

The biggest advantage was that children grew up with fewer complexes, secure in the love of the whole family. Besides, there was so much of good sense and moral, values that came down to them from the elders in the family. This strengthens the idea that the old and new generations can not only live together, but be good for each other.

Today, with most families having opted to go nuclear, and where both parents need to earn a living, children are often left to their own devices. (Pun intended!) Children often get dependent on social media to the exclusion of everything else. The other danger is that parents feel so guilty about not having enough time for their children that they indulge them in every way possible, which could turn the latter into self-centred brats, unable to withstand any opposition when it comes to their demands.

                                                                                           Adobe Stock

 Parenting is an art, especially in the modern world where there are so many opportunities and temptations available to young ones. How can parents avoid the danger signs and steer their offspring over the multi-pronged path of life, which has alleys leading to myriad options? Which are the right options, and which are the deadlocks?

 Often, an elder in the family can offer the right solution, but of course, it is possible that the older one is, the less one is in touch with the younger generation, which has a mind and a half of its own.

The only way to survive gracefully is to meet each other halfway. Gone are the days when elders could command and force their opinions down their children’s throats. Diplomacy is the key word today, in a world where the young have travelled far beyond to realms which their predecessors never even imagined could exist. Another key word is communication, a word that can help bridge the generation gap.

                                                                                                  Freepik

We see that progress here when Zo and Sam speak on topics beyond our understanding, be it music and musicians, new cartoon and anime characters and books that are all the rage. If we sat in our ivory tower and sulked, that would go against us. Hence, we try and involve ourselves in their interests and find ourselves evolving as well. Never do we talk down to them. Children are perspicacious and know exactly when adults are trying to bulldoze their way through or acting high and mighty.

So, I sit down and play with them games that they love, while they pick up the games that I have always enjoyed. Nana talks to them about basketball and netball, and the ways to grow stronger muscles. (Always a good idea to nudge that topic in when they are eating!) The delightful rewards are always special hugs and kisses.

                                                                                                        iStock

In all my years of teaching I have learnt a couple of things.

1.      Never talk down to children. Treat them according to their age, and do not use baby talk. They can speak coherently and sensibly. So why curb those sensibilities?

2.      Use the Mutt and Jeff method of dealing with them. Be firm when required, and be friendly at all other times. There is no harm in reformative punishment, but it should be appropriate.

3.      Never hurt their feelings or belittle them in any way, physically or emotionally. They need to feel that the world is a wonderful place and that they have their own place in the sun. Every child has his or her own qualities which make them blossom. Water those qualities.

4.      Turn into a child when you are with them. Be silly, let your hair down and have fun. These moments are precious. When you unbend, they will also open up to you. A bit of horseplay never goes astray.

5.      Above all, treat them as individuals. Do not compare them to anyone else because that can be extremely damaging.

6.      Show them you love them in as many ways as you can. 

      We know that we have had our chance to be parents to P. Today, when we watch her being a parent to Zo and Sam, it amazes us… the way she walks the tightrope of being a disciplinarian and a friend. P herself feels that she is a strict parent. However, we watch those moments when she tickles them, teases them, dances with them to their favourite songs, pulls their leg and plays games with them… moments punctuated with giggles, laughs, tickles and cuddles.

      The next moment, she tells them off when they fight with each other and they know that she is not joking any more. As she puts it, “I am the strict one and V is the fun one, especially because I am the one at home with them.” P works from home and hence, spends many more hours with them. Of course, V has his strict moments as well, but those are rarer, and hence, maybe fiercer. 

 

 

 

Vecteezy

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All said and done, we have a lot of fun together as a family.

                                                                                                     Etsy

I am participating in the #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge2025.

https://deepties.blogspot.com/2025/04/youth-and-old-age.html

THE 'X' FACTOR IN LIFE!

 

Life has turned 'xtremely competitive.

                                                                                                       Medium

I recall my own school days when studies were not a bugbear, and tuitions were only for those who needed a helping hand.

After school, a whole gang of us would gulp down our coffee/ tea/ juice and be off like a flash to the playground where we would flex our almost non-existent muscles and 'xpend all our energy tearing about like little streaks of lightning. Hide-n-seek, Dodgeball, Stapo, Catch... the choices were myriad, but by 6.30 pm, mothers' voices would be heard in the twilight, calling out names, their eyes trying to pierce through the dim shadows to identify their offspring.

How life has transformed today! Many children go straight to coaching centres and tuitions after school. Even though they are 'xhausted after the hurly-burly of normal school, they sit through the grind, either for themselves or for their parents.

                                                                                                Shutterstock

On reaching home, they have a quick wash, and have a tiny break in which they watch something on their devices... mental activity, but sadly no physical movement. Break over, they sit down in front of their books to complete their homework/ projects.

By dinner time, they droop like little flowers, their eyelids closing as they struggle to stay awake, too tired to respond to their parents' queries about school, their friends, ‘xtra-curricular activities or academics. Voila, the day is done!

Luckily, Zo and Sam are too young to have been caught up in the academic labyrinth. Their day ends at around 3, but they have their ‘xtra murals in the second half which includes netball, art and design, ball skills and public speaking. Zo is into netball matches and Sam loves basketball. He dribbles like a little pro. They are both waiting with ‘xcitement for a netball/basketball hoop at home.

The spectre of social media has wound itself around everyone, children not ‘xcluded. The other day, Sam came to me and said wistfully, “Mooma, I wish I had WhatsApp on my phone. Zo has it on hers.”

I ‘xplained to him that Zo had got the App when she was eight and that he had more than two and a half years to go. “Awww, not fair!” was his comment. The niggling problems that little ones face!

                                                                              WhatsApp image - Freepik

I go through Zo’s school notebooks which are colourful. Her work is neat and punctuated with comments from her teacher – ‘xcellent, ‘xtraordinary work, ‘Well done’, and ‘I am impressed’. Sam’s teacher is also equally ‘xpressive and lets her comments speak for themselves. They use stickers with emojis and hearts. Last time, when I went back to India from Johannesburg, I picked up a whole lot of stickers which I use in school. The sight of those hearts and tiny messages makes me feel warm and fuzzy and I can only imagine how ‘xhilarated children get when they view them on their notebooks. After all, a compliment a day goes a long way!

                                                                                                    Amazon.in

It is no fallacy that often children who do ‘xceedingly well in school sometimes get nowhere in life. The reverse is also true. Often, back benchers and drop-outs perform brilliantly in life. There are so many in’xplicable factors that come into play, factors that may not seem significant in the growing years, but come into their own, later on in life. That is the true mystery of life, after all, and one never knows what it is that can turn into that ‘X Factor’ that helps one to succeed in life,

Wikipedia

I am participating in the #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge2025.

https://deepties.blogspot.com/2025/04/the-x-factor-in-life.html

WORDS AND WRITING! #BLOGCHATTERA2ZCHALLENGE

 

Words have always had the power to enchant me ever since I was very young. The thrill of putting the right word in the right place started when I began playing the popular word game 'Scrabble'.

I spent two years with my paternal grandparents in Shoranur, Kerala, when my Army father was posted in an obscure station where there were no good schools. Every afternoon I would come back from school, and there she would be, my darling grandma, waiting to play Scrabble with me.

I have always wanted to be a writer, and after I wrote my first poem at the age of ten, I never looked back. I would scribble on every bit of paper I could lay hands on and hide them away in little niches not even allowing the room to be swept. Years later, my mother, herself a talented writer, put all these scraps together and brought out a collection of my poems titled 'Deeparadhana'.

All through school and college, I continued to write, trying to hone my vocabulary. The deliciousness of juicy words which sparkled in a sea of writing broth! That sense of joy when a poem or a story was published in a college magazine!

I am, now, in the process of bringing out my eleventh solo book, and having a story nestle in my thirtieth anthology along with other writers. Do I need further proof of how significant words have been in my life? How many people do I thank for this gift - my grandparents, my parents, my siblings, G, my better half and his family, my uncles, aunts and cousins? P has been a silent observer of all my writing, and she is the first person I send my stories to. She gives me good sound advice.

However, it does not end there. Every person I have come across in life has left an imprint on my writing; my teachers, my offline and online friends, my writing groups, my editors and my publishers. Writing is not done in an island, it may be a solitary activity, but it is the sum of total of influences and experiences that one has gone through in life.

When I was doing Literature in college I came across myriad lines in poetry that remain etched in my mind even today. Here are just a few examples.

                                                                                            Ode to Autumn - John Keats

W.B. Yeats

Ode to a Nightingale - John Keats

The Road Not Taken - Robert Frost

                                                                                           Pinterest images

Today, when I sit and play Scrabble on paper with Zo and Sam, my thoughts go back to those balmy afternoons when I used to play Scrabble with my grandmother. How life has come round, full circle! I enjoy watching them both, scrabbling for words, as they put them down with avid interest.

                                                                                Pictures Credit: Deepti Menon

This morning, we went to Hamleys, the toy shop, to buy the actual board game of Scrabble so that I could share the magic and the mystery of words with my two little ones. The moment we got home, we sat down, P, Zo, Sam and I, with V putting in his pennyworth, helping the little ones to create their words. I was back in my treasured space.

                                                                                          Picture credits: Priyanka Menon Rao

May words continue to inspire us all!

 I am participating in the #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge2025.

https://deepties.blogspot.com/2025/04/words-and-writing-blogchattera2zchallen.html

VITAMINS AND VALUES! #BLOGCHATTERA2ZCHALLENGE

 

"Your body needs Vitamin D. Take these tablets once a week, and then once a month," said the doctor.

In a country like India, where the sun shines bright and clear, more than three-quarters of the population are deficient in Vitamin D. Mind- boggling, isn't it? Of course, I had a quarter of a course of the tablets, and then forgot my next dose, which put an end to the treatment.

                                                                                                     IndiaMART

Feeling rundown? Exhausted? Have multivitamin tablets, says the general rule. That is something that G and I take regularly. When we got to Johannesburg, our first jaunt was to Clicks where we picked up a bottle of Centrum  Active.

                                                                                                    Amazon.co.za

While these vitamins are essential for the body, I have grown up with a few other vitamins which have done me good, or at least I think so.

One is Vitamin N, which my mother was particular about, and she gave my sisters and me regular doses of it. Vitamin N translates to the art of saying 'No'. We had an enjoyable childhood, but whenever we went overboard, as children are prone to do, she would curb our high spirits by saying 'No' firmly. A teacher and later the inspirational founder of a school, she was a stern disciplinarian, and did not condone extravagance, bad behaviour or indiscipline.

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All of us imbibed the lesson and handed it down to the next generation. P has taken to it like a fish to water, and along with V, she ensures that Zo and Sam are given healthy doses of Vitamin N.

Another essential vitamin is Vitamin H, which stands for humour, a quality that is so required to survive in a world that is growing grumpier over the decades. As a family, we all have our little jokes and puns that make every gathering a fun occasion. The references could be from movies watched, or books and cartoons, or just day-to-day incidents. Whatever the source, we end up in splits. Having a funny bone matters, and staying optimistic helps us stay afloat. One saying has always nestled in my heart -

"Two men look out through prison bars;

One sees the mud, the other the stars."

If we can fill the hearts of our children with optimism, it would make them happier individuals. Not that it means that they should view the world through rose coloured spectacles, but laughter does make the world go around.

                                                                                                Happify

The other day, we were at a friend's house for dinner, when father and daughter began a discussion. G aired his views about how we as grandparents should enjoy the company of our grandchildren as they were still young.

“When they grow up, they will get busy with their own lives and may not have time for us.”

P responded vociferously, saying, “Pa, it is a matter of upbringing. If we teach our children the right values, they will never stray. I am so close to all the elders and everyone in our family even though I am so far away in Johannesburg.”

                                                                                                  Pinterest

That set me thinking. The world today is struggling with a whole lot of problems. There is a definite divide between generations, between parents and children, leading to maladjustment, misunderstanding and unhappiness. Earlier, we were fortunate enough to have our grandparents with us. While we learnt a lot in school, it was these elders who told us stories, sang to us and helped us imbibe the vales which made us the people we are today. Wouldn’t you call those learnings doses of Vitamin V – values?

So, there you have it. Vitamins to get us all going! As I watch Zo and Sam, I hope, deep within my heart, that we will be able to help them get all the vitamins that they need to grow into beautiful and wise individuals. As of now, it warms the cockles of my heart to see that they have made a good start.

 

                                                                                           Not on the High Street

I am participating in the #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge2025.

https://deepties.blogspot.com/2025/04/vitamins-and-values-blogchattera2zchall.html

UMBRELLAS AND MUFFLERS! #BLOGCHATTERA2ZCHALLENGE

 

“What goes up when the rain comes down?” 

“An umbrella, of course!” I don’t think Zo and Sam have heard that one for it is such an old, hackneyed riddle, as old as me.

The umbrellas are out, and the woollens that have been kept in hibernation have been shaken out of their slumber. Two rainy days have chased the sun away here in Johannesburg, and I have not been able to take my hands off my hot cup of green tea.

                                                                                                  Freepik

G, my better half, has been listening to various weather forecasters, all of whom have spoken of the cold front that is expected to last for a couple of days. “After that, the sun will be out and it will get warmer,” he remarks, his voice brimming with confidence. Shivering in my three layers, I hope against hope that he is right!

                                                                                       dreamstime.com

Zo and Sam leave for school just before seven, and on a rainy day, it seems like midnight. P ushers them out of the house well before time so that they can play for a while in school before the bell rings. Once the cereal goes in and the school uniforms come on, they are usually raring to go. P, who enjoys her sleep-in in the mornings, waits for the days when V drives them to school, but as she says, once you are up, you are up! Hence, her days start early, and she begins her work on the laptop early as well. Weekends are, of course, relaxed mornings and other-things-to-do days!

Since the morning is nippy, but not rainy, G and I decide to walk down to the opposite mall to Checkers, the closest supermarket. We miss the little ones who used to amble along with us during the holidays. P tells us that if it does drizzle, she will pick us up in the car.

I wear two sweaters, two pairs of socks and a scarf, feeling akin to an Eskimo. By the time we get to Checkers, my nose, ears and hands are chilled. Before our shopping is done, P is there. “There is a drizzle,” she explains, but when we are on our way out, we can hardly feel it, so well clad are we. We end up buying a few more things, since the car is there, anyway.

                                                                                             Free Vectors

Johannesburg looks beautiful when the clouds turn grey, bunched up like cotton wool, casting a pall around. The trees are already wondering if they should shed their foliage. At one moment, the sun shines through the branches, like a sparkly eye in the sky; actually, more like the torchlight on a mobile phone. A less romantic image, but more apt!

                                                                                                  Unsplash

The one issue about the rains is that clothes do not dry. We place them outside at one elusive glimpse of sunshine, and then the rain comes down and soaks everything all over again. On top of that, we have two dogs who jump at the clothesline, and make off with the underwear.

                                                                                            www.wpc.plus

I have found the ideal solution to staying warm though winter; washing dishes in hot soapy water. It is absolute bliss to allow the heat to seep onto your palms, and the bonus is that the dishes get done as well.

                                                                                                       Clipart Library

Of course, P and I have regular spats over the issue. She does not approve, and threatens me with dialogues like…

“Mama, you will make me get up and do the dishes early in the morning!” (Emotional blackmail!)

“Can you please stop making me feel guilty?” (Genuine frustration!)

“I will have to lock the kitchen door!” (Except that there is no kitchen door!)

The latest trial was using the dishwasher that had apparently been installed a year ago. P was insistent that there was a problem with it. All of us rallied around V and placed a whole load of dishes inside it. It worked beautifully with the dishes coming out, bright and sparkly. We were overjoyed, all except P who expected the worst.

The leak began immediately after the dishes were removed. Three times, there was a deluge, and three times P mopped the floor, her expression priceless. It said, “I told you so!”

                                                                                              CartoonStock

I am participating in the #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge2025.

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TERROR IN PAHALGAM! #BLOGCHATTERA2ZCHALLENGE

 

                                                                                                            Freepik

The Kashmir Valley has been stained red, yet again!

It is heartbreaking to see the visuals coming on the television after the dastardly attack by terrorists in the scenic locale of Baisaran, Pahalgam, in Kashmir, a place often referred to as mini-Switzerland. Using AK 47 rifles, they opened fire on a group of tourists who were enjoying themselves, most of whom had taken a well-deserved break away from their busy lives.

The terrorists walked out of the woods and segregated the men from the women, asked them their religion and demanded that the men recite Islamic prayers. Those who could not were identified as Hindus and shot in front of their terrified family members. When one bereaved woman pleaded with them to kill her as well, one of the killers told her brusquely to go and give the Indian Prime Minister a warning.

28 Indians from across the country were killed in this mindless attack. Businessmen, officers from the IB, the Indian Air Force and the Navy, newly weds, and even a resident of Pahalgam were all victims. The perpetrators were in Indian Army uniforms.

The attack has stunned the whole of India. Citizens are protesting as the country stands, outraged, burning effigies and blaming Pakistan.

Kashmir has been at the forefront of terrorism over the decades. It is only in the recent past that things had settled down and the tourism industry had started flourishing. Last year saw a record turnout as tourists returned to this picturesque state.

This was the most unkindest cut of all!

In my first book titled 'Arms and the Woman' (Rupa Publishers, Delhi), I had referred to terrorists as belonging to no country, having no sentiments, because they have been so deeply indoctrinated in hatred and blind faith. They turn into lethal killing machines, mercenary to the hilt. They behave like puppets, their strings pulled by master puppeteers sitting in another country.

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The Home Minister met the mourning families, assuring them of a strong retaliation to the attack, as well as offering compensation for those gunned down and the injured.

Unfortunately, a life lost is a life lost forever. A bereaved family grieves for a lifetime. Survivors carry the wounds in their hearts, often also the guilt of having survived when others have not.

We sit in front of the television in Johannesburg, trying to take in the enormity of what has happened. Scene after scene is replayed - the sudden shots, the terrified victims caught in the gunfire, the trauma of having loved ones gunned down, the screams and the tears, the names of the dead, and their back stories... heartrending accounts that stress on the ephemeral nature of life.

'Shadows Never Lie' (Readomania Publishers), my third book in the Shadow series, has a story titled 'The Survivor ' based on terrorism in the Kashmir valley, where a group kills Kashmiri Pandits on one Republic Day. The story was based on true accounts for the Valley has been victim to so much of bloodshed and suffering.

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I glance at Zo and Sam, two little ones, who are growing up in a world of chaos, where countries attack other countries, religious wars are fought and innocents get caught in a crossfire in battles that are not of their making. It sets me thinking. If only there could be a master plan in which only the wicked could be punished for their nefarious deeds. It is the killing of innocents that wrenches the heart, the visuals of little children and women who suffer from hunger, anguish and helplessness, as well as the fear of violence and molestation.

As the old saying goes, "An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind." Mahatma Gandhi

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I am participating in the #BlogchatterA2ZChallenge 2025.

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